Tara by Jennifer Bene

Author:Jennifer Bene [Bene, Jennifer]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2016-06-02T23:00:00+00:00

“He killed him in front of you?” Alaric was staring at her with an open mouth.

The cold separation in her body was the same as the first time she had successfully detached, when the pain of Leonidas’ death had snapped something inside her. It had made her ‘self’ a loose thing that she could move, that she could send somewhere else when reality was too much.

After that day it hadn’t mattered what they did to her, she was never there anyway. She slept horribly without him near her, even for centuries after. There had been nothing but the cold fog inside her repeating her nightmares.

Then she’d found music to fill the empty spaces inside her. That had been some comfort.

That day she’d cried so hard for him that she’d damaged her vocal chords. Her sobs had continued until morning, and it was the last time she had felt anything that strongly. Even now, the cool buffer of being detached kept the memories from completely tearing her apart.

Alaric had asked her a question. What was it? Tara forced herself to return to the present.

“Oh. Yes, kyrios killed him.” Her voice was empty.

“Kyrios means?”

“Master. It was the only thing I was ever allowed to call him.” She’d hated him with a fury that rivaled the gods before Leonidas died. Afterwards she was too empty to hate him.

“Did he – did he keep you?”

“For another few months, then he died in a battle. His soldiers believed it was because he broke Leonidas and me apart. If that was true, it was the only kindness Apollo or any of those gods ever gave me.”

Now that sounded bitter.

“So that’s why you’re so calm in the face of everything? Because he died?” Alaric said it as gently as possible, but the observation still hurt for some reason.

“I’m calm because I have to detach from this life to survive it. That’s what Leonidas had figured out so quickly, and what he tried to teach me. If I detach, then none of it matters.” Tara winced as she breathed deeper than she should have and the torn muscle over her stomach sent pain rushing through her.

“It does matter.”

Oh no. He was contemplating something stupid. Tara could see it in the way his brows knit together.

“No.” Her voice came out stronger than it should have with the blood loss and the pain she was in. “No, Alaric. You will not do anything stupid. You will deliver me to Luca, or whomever Luca tells you to. You’re not betraying the man who saved you for no reason.”

Alaric stared at her hard. “I can talk –“

Tara raised her hand and stopped him. “No. There is no saving me, Alaric. Gormahn doesn’t forgive, and he will not forget that I am meant to serve.” He clenched his jaw and she knew he was angry with her, but she’d accept that if it meant he lived. “I’m not losing another good person over a moment of weakness.”

Light suffused her skin just then, starting

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